Burial photos

Here's a link to the photos Jim's niece took at his burial and the mass that preceded it: http://homepage.mac.com/suzana_bucciarelli/jimfuneral/. You'll see his daughters, his siblings, a number of his nieces and nephews and their children, and several friends from his early years among the guests. The wood box holds his ashes.

From the Mass in his childhood church

This is the homily Jim's oldest brother, Monsignor Robert Bucciarelli, delivered April 19, 2008.

1.
Jesus loved Martha and her sister [Mary] and Lazaus [their brother]. They are his friends. We are moved to hear Martha say: “Lord if you had been here my brother would not have died”. James Meehan Bucciarelli our brother, father, uncle, our friend, died in January this year. Today we will inter his ashes in the cemetery where are buried his grandparents, who came to New Canaan from Italy, a hundred years ago, our aunts Antoinette and Rose –Rose died 11 years ago today- and our parents Louis and Jeane. I have celebrated the funeral Masses for all of them here in St. Aloysius over the years.

But death is not the last word for them, for Jim, or for any of us. Jesus said to Martha: “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and whoever lives and believes in me shall never die.” (Jn 11: 25-27).

In the death of Lazarus, Jesus shows his humanity and his divinity. He wept over Lazarus even though he knew he would restore him to life. When the bystanders see him shed tears, they comment: “See how he loved him!” Yet that compassionate heart is the heart of God. Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead. He shows he is master of life and death. But that miracle pales in comparison with Christ’s own resurrection which comes after an ignominious and painful death. “No one takes my life from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have power to lay it down and I have power to take it up again” (Jn 10:17-18).

Because he is God, Jesus rose from the dead on his own power. His resurrection was like an explosion of power, light and love that broke the chains of sin and death, first for himself and then for us. He lives! He knows us, he loves us, he hears us, he cares for us.

2.
One of the great women saints, Teresa of Avila, said: “I want to see God, and in order to see him I must die”. Jesus says “In my father’s house there are many rooms” (Jn 14:2). There is room for each and everyone but to enter we must cross the threshold which we do by dying. As an ancient prayer for the dead says: “Life is changed not taken away”.

When Jim was baptised here in St. Aloysius parish a little more than 68 years ago, his god-parents were questioned: “What do you ask of the Church?” They answered: “Faith.” “And what does faith give you?” “Eternal life”.

In his encyclical letter Spe Salvi (Saved by hope), Pope Benedict asks what is eternal life? He says it is what we yearn for without knowing what it is. It is beyond time; it is not an unending succession of days in the calendar, but “something more like the supreme moment of satisfaction… like plunging into the ocean of infinite love”(n. 12). Just as color cannot be described to a person born blind so also one cannot explain what a life outside of time and space is like to those who are still in time and space. However, we have experienced the happiness of being loved by persons who are better than we are. In heaven, we will be loved by the three divine Persons, Father, Son and Holy Spirit and by those who loved us and who we love.

Jim knew that lots of people cared for him. He let himself be loved. (We can love because we have first been loved). Jim hoped that in eternal life he would be reunited with friends and relatives, especially with our mother, Jeane. All of them would have had their love purified because to be with God who is love, all imperfection needs to be shed. Since we believe that this purification can take place even after death we offer prayers and especially the sacrifice of this Mass asking God to have mercy on the souls of the departed so they can be well prepared for the unending love of heaven.

Prayerful remembrance of Jim is one characteristic of the new relationship with him that comes with his passing to another, better life. There is also gratitude for having had him as part of our family and of our circle of friends. We thank God for having known him. We thank Jim for what he gave us by loving us.

3.
Christ is our hope. As the Byzantine liturgy prays at Easter: “Christ is risen from the dead. Dying, he conquered death; to the dead he has given life (Troparion of Easter; cf. CCC 638). This is the faith believed and lived as the central truth by the first Christian community, handed down through generations. This is the faith that Jim had and which all the baptised have expressed.

Christ comforts us, but he also challenges us. Jesus challenges Martha whom he loved. “I am the resurrection …” He asks her: “Do you believe this?” He loves us just as he loved Mary, Martha and Lazarus. Let us allow him to challenge our human certainties about death, and help us see through the appearances to the reality of his resurrection, the centre of our faith, and the joyful promise it holds for our own resurrection. “Yes, Lord, I believe but help me to have more faith, hope and love.

May the Mother of God intercede on our behalf and make us worthy of the promises of Christ. Amen.

More photos

Photos

Formerly of New Canaan, CT

Here is the obituary written by Jim's sister Joan, as it appeared in their hometown paper, the New Canaan Advertiser.

James Meehan Bucciarelli, a former Greenwich High School teacher, died Jan. 4 in Portland, Ore.

Born Oct. 31, 1939, in Norwalk, he was the third son of the late Louis L. and Jeane M. Bucciarelli.

Mr. Bucciarelli attended New Canaan’s Center School and Saxe Junior High School and graduated with the New Canaan High School Class of 1957, in which he was named “Most Outstanding Senior.” He received a bachelor of arts degree in history from Harvard College (Eliot House) in 1961 and a master of arts degree in teaching from Wesleyan University in 1963.

In 1965, Mr. Bucciarelli married Jean Grace Manly; they divorced in 1979 and remained friends, family members said. The couple lived in Ridgefield while married, raising daughters Jessica and Gracie, born respectively in 1967 and 1970, there.

While living in Ridgefield, Mr. Bucciarelli taught at GHS, developing innovative teaching programs for students who were not college-bound. He represented the school’s faculty in labor negotiations with the school board and built lasting relationships with fellow teachers. A Harvard Book Club award is given annually in Mr. Bucciarelli’s name to a Greenwich High School graduating senior.

In the summer of 1970, the Bucciarellis moved to northeast Portland, Ore., where Mr. Bucciarelli was recruited to be a team leader at Adams High School. He dedicated his teaching and talent to raising awareness of social justice and community-based planning initiatives, such as those of the federal government’s Model Cities Program. He encouraged students to graduate from high school with a love of learning.

Mr. Bucciarelli fell ill with brainstem encephalitis in 1981, a disease that took away his ability to speak clearly, control his movements, walk, and work. He also lived with bipolar disorder.

For more than 20 years, Mr. Bucciarelli lived independently, but in July 2005, he needed skilled nursing care and moved to the West Hills Center care facility, where he resided until his death. His commitment to his daughters, his former wife, his brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews was strengthened during this time, his family said.

“His continuing sense of humor and humility founded in his faith and love for those in his life will be remembered by many,” they added.

In addition to his former wife, Mr. Bucciarelli is survived by his daughters; their partners, Katherine Jaramillo and Kristen Dilley; his brothers, Msgr. Robert P. Bucciarelli and Louis L. (Larry) Bucciarelli Jr.; his sisters, Joan Bucciarelli Yim and Diane Bucciarelli Cerreto; his sister-in-law Ann; his brother-in-law Joe; nieces and nephews; and grandnieces and grandnephews.

A funeral Mass will be celebrated by Msgr. Bucciarelli at St. Aloysius Church, New Canaan, on Saturday, April 19, at 11:30. There will be a reception after the service and interment of Mr. Bucciarelli’s ashes will follow in St. John’s cemetery in Springdale.

Donations may be made in Mr. Bucciarelli’s honor to the St. Vincent de Paul Downtown Chapel, 601 West Burnside, Portland, OR 97209, or at Downtownchapel.org. Testimonials may be posted at Themanwhocametodinner.blogspot.com.

Formerly of Ridgefield, CT

Here is the obituary Jean Bucciarelli submitted to the Ridgefield Press. It appeared in somewhat edited form. Jean notes, "Jim and I lived in Ridgefield the first five years of our marriage and both our daughters were born in nearby Danbury and had their first home in the Nash Apartments on Ridgefield's Main Street."

James Meehan Bucciarelli, a former resident of Ridgefield, died January 4 in Portland, Oregon. Jim, son of Louis L. and Jeane Meehan Bucciarelli, was born October 31, 1939 in Norwalk CT. He spent his childhood and adolescent years in New Canaan. Following graduation from Harvard, Jim earned a Masters of Art in Teaching degree from Wesleyan University. Jim taught in the Social Studies department at Greenwich H.S. from 1963 until 1970.

While at Wesleyan, Jim met Jean Grace Manly. Upon graduation from Wesleyan, Jean moved to the Nash Apartments and taught Social Studies at Ridgefield H.S. 1964-1966. In August 1965, Jim and Jean were married in Colorado Springs, Colorado. They returned to live in the Nash Apartments. Jim Scarboro, Ridgefield Press reporter and his wife, Ann, also lived in the Nash Apartments. Jean knew the Scarboros from undergraduate studies at Colorado College and the Bucciarellis and Scarboros established an enduring friendship.

Jim and Jean welcomed the births of Jessica Manly in July 1967 and Susan Grace in February 1970. In the summer of 1970 the family moved to Portland, Oregon, where Jim accepted a Team Leader position in a new high school. Jim was a talented and memorable teacher, who also kept involved in local and national economic and social justice issues. In 1978 Jim and Jean divorced; they remained friends.

Jim lived with bipolar disorder. In 1981 brain stem encephalitis robbed Jim of his ability to speak clearly, walk, or work. Still, Jim managed to live quite independently in downtown Portland for 24 years. He enjoyed zipping along downtown streets in his wheelchair to attend Saturday evening Mass at the Downtown Chapel, or to imbibe an occasional gin and tonic at an Irish pub. For about a dozen years, the highlight of his year was getting away from rainy winter Portland to spend a few weeks with his Mother in Honolulu.

In July 2005, Jim’s declining physical health necessitated a move to a Portland skilled nursing facility. During the next 2 ½ years, through frequent visits, cards and letters, and phone calls, love deepened between Jim and his daughters Jessica and Gracie, former wife Jean, his brothers and sisters and close friends. He very much enjoyed seeing Jim and Ann Scarboro when they visited Portland last summer. Jim continued to appreciate beauty in the arts and nature and to be interested in world events. He listened to classical music and to books on CD. His strong faith endured and continued to guide him through the final weeks of his life. Jim Bucciarelli lived his life with a sense of humor and humility that touched many people.

Jim is survived by his daughters and their partners, Jessica (Katherine Jaramillo), Portland, and Gracie (Kristen Dilley), Berkeley CA; brothers, Monsignor Robert Bucciarelli, Dublin, Ireland and Dr. Louis Bucciarelli (Ann), Belmont, Mass; sisters, Joan Bucciarelli Yim, Kirkland, WA and Diane Bucciarelli Cerreto (Joseph), Mansfield Center, CT; and his former wife, Jean of Portland. A funeral Mass was held at Portland’s St. Vincent DePaul Downtown Chapel. Monsignor Robert Bucciarelli will officiate at a funeral Mass to be held 11:30 a.m. April 19 at St. Aloysius in New Canaan. Following a reception, interment of cremains will be held at St. John’s Cemetery in Springdale.

Fr. Bob Loughery's message to Downtown Chapel

From the bulletin of Jim's church, The Downtown Chapel of St. Vincent de Paul Catholic Parish:

Baptism of the Lord, January 13, 2008

Dear Parishioners,

I learned today (Jan. 4) that one of our long time parishioners, Jim Bucciarelli, died after a long illness. We pray for his rest and peace. Jim was one of the first parishioners I met when I came to the parish six years ago. Jim suffered physically, stricken by an illness many years ago that confined him to a wheelchair and made it difficult for him to communicate. but Jim had a strong spirit and he never lost his sense of humor. He was always faithful attending our Saturday vigil Mass, arriving at the chapel on his battery powered wheelchair from his apartment nearby. He wanted his independence and the freedom to move about. Mass on Saturday was a non-negotiable; you could count on him to be here.

One might have seen Jim and pitied him, seeing him confined and limited in what he could do. Yet, I saw someone strong, brave, faithful and engaged in life. He would sit in his chair on the side aisle near the tabernacle. His presence there in that place was a sign of his belonging to us; the faith that carried and sustained him was a witness to the rest of us. He taught us to trust, have hope, be faithful, remember our dignity, and to seek the Lord in everything.

I saw Jim the last hours of his life. I gathered with his daughters and their partners and we said our last prayers of anointing with Jim. We spoke to Jim of our gratitude for him, for the ways he touched our lives. As I listened to the grateful words being shared, I realized, though his body was diminished by illness, how his sould remained large and embracing. The scripture passage we read was from John's gospel. "I am the vine, you are the branches...No more than a branch can bear fruit apart from the vine, can you bear fruit apart from me." I listened to the ones who were branch and fruit of Jim's life and love. We remembered how Jim was always part of the vine of Jesus, how his life had borne much fruit, even in suffering. We held vigil at his bedside as he clung tight to Jesus--present to Jim in the healing sacrament, calling him to come home. Today's gospel reading from Matthew and the account of Jesus' baptism seems appropriate as I think of the life of Jim Bucciarelli. "This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased."

Today we celebrate the Baptism of Jesus, and as a Church, we mark the end of the season of Christmas. One might think of the liturgies of Christmas as a focus on Jesus' birth, growth and formation. It concludes with our celebration of his baptism. His baptism marked the beginning of a life of service and teaching. In early February we will begin Lent and the focus on Jesus' suffering, passion and death, followed by Easter. These seasons and liturgies move us through a full cycle of birth, life, death, and new birth--the paschal mystery of Christ. The thread of faith is woven through it all. We remember those who have gone before us who bore witness to their faith as followers of Jesus. today, as we mark the end of the Christmas season, we are aware of our own growth and formation in faith, and of our baptismal call to live our faith in the world in love and service. We model our lives after the "beloved Son" who was the light for those in darkness and freedom for those in confinement, who went about doing good and healing all those oppressed.

--Fr. Bob

Donations in memory

Four organizations were present in Jim's life at the very end. Two were part of his routine for decades, while the other two arrived on the scene in mid-December.

The Downtown Chapel of St. Vincent de Paul was the one organization to which Jim gave financial support in his later years. Downtown Chapel is the Roman Catholic church closest to Jim's longtime apartment downtown. Its Open Door Ministries "bring healing and hope to our neighbors in Old Town Portland" through programs such as a hospitality center, a food pantry, and the Brother Andre Cafe. Jim's funeral Mass at Downtown Chapel was full of beauty, humor, love and spirit. Three of his fellow parishioners spoke of the ways Jim ministered to members of the congregation simply through his faithful presence at the Vigil Mass at 5 p.m. each Saturday. Downtown Chapel has a special financial need right now because their elevator isn't working. The sanctuary is on the main floor, but the gathering space and restrooms and other amenities are upstairs.

The sound of All Classical Radio 89.9 was a hallmark of Jim's presence at the nursing home. He and his visitors listened for many hours each day, sometimes while watching golf or football on TV with the sound turned down. Many people remarked on the beauty and peace in his room; the quilts and classical music were responsible for much of this quality (as were prayer and love). "A Permanent Home on Your Dial" is the station's campaign to finish purchasing their broadcasting license from Portland Public Schools.

Jim became a patient of the Hospice program of Providence Hospital about a week before Christmas. The hospice nurse, chaplain and social worker collaborated beautifully with Jim's doctor and the West Hills staff to help him understand what was happening and be physically and mentally comfortable. They helped family find meaning and peace as well.

The third and final visit from Sacred Flight took place the night before Jim died. Sacred Flight is "a palliative music practice for end-of-life care...an organization of music thanatologists offering the prescriptive qualities of live music with harp and voice at the bedside of people who are terminally ill and dying." Jim quietly and powerfully appreciated the harpists' work. Staff and visitors who were present treasured the experience as well.